Richard Emmitt Joiner

Richard Emmitt Joiner died peacefully, his wife Emily by his side, on April 1, 2025, at age 90. He was born on January 2, 1935, in Fort Pierce, Florida, to James William Joiner and Frances Roberta Emmitt Joiner. Richard’s father died when he was two, and his mother had to work to support the family, so he and his older brother, Jim, were raised primarily by their grandmother, Frances Emmitt. Their reduced circumstances inspired Richard to work hard and cultivate frugality and stubbornness that persisted and benefited him in pursuit of his goals throughout his life.

Music was one such goal. At age 13 Richard made up his mind to learn to play the piano even though the family did not have the resources to pay for lessons, much less a piano. Through sheer force of will, he made it happen. He approached Edith Myers, the Music Director at his church, about giving him lessons. She agreed to take him on and to let him practice at church. He proved to be such an adept and diligent student that he progressed rapidly and soon became her star pupil. Two years later Richard, with Mrs. Myers’ encouragement and tutelage, began to take lessons on the pipe organ, progressing just as rapidly as he had with the piano. The organ soon became his instrument of choice so that he was able to use his skills to substitute at churches and play for weddings and funerals in Fort Pierce. Mrs. Myers had a lasting influence on Richard, and he spoke of her with great admiration for the rest of his life.

In college, Richard pursued a degree in fine arts from Florida State’s renowned music program. During his college years he traveled as accompanist with various choral groups and on one occasion performed Camille Saint-Saens' Organ Symphony with the university orchestra. He also traveled with one of his teachers to organ conventions where he heard Catharine Crozier, his favorite concert organist, perform.

After college Richard worked for several years in a church in Stuart, Florida, near his hometown. During that time, his college teacher encouraged him to apply to the School of Sacred Music at Union Theological Seminary in New York City. It was a very competitive program, accepting only a few students from all over the world each year, and Richard was doubtful that he would be accepted. But after a laborious application process that included performing for some of the professors at the school he was awarded one of the spots in the class of 1963. Richard delighted in recounting how one professor commented, after hearing his pre-acceptance performance, "That was better than expected!" Richard made the most of his time in New York, doing exemplary work in his studies and taking advantage of as many cultural events as he had opportunity to attend. His time in New York was one of his fondest memories and a source of many stories, oft repeated, throughout his life.

After graduation from Union, Richard accepted the position of Music Director at Watts Street Baptist Church in Durham, North Carolina. In the summer of 1963, he moved to Durham and began his work at Watts Street.

Watts Street Baptist Church was just a block away from Duke University's East Campus, which in 1963 housed the Women's College. The church attracted many Duke students, one of whom was Emily Wyatt, a first year student in 1963. Richard and Emily first met at the church, where she and several other Duke students would join the choir during his tenure. Their relationship was strictly platonic during Emily's Duke years, and when she graduated, she moved back to Raleigh where she had grown up.

Emily and Richard were not in contact again until Lou and Don Kline, mutual friends of theirs, decided they would make a good couple. The Klines had been members of Watts Street and had befriended Richard there. When they moved to Raleigh, they joined the church that Emily had returned to and realized that Emily and Richard knew each other. Soon thereafter Lou invited them both to dinner and the resulting romance eventually solidified into a true love. They married on November 20, 1971, a union that lasted 53 years until his death.

In the meantime, Richard was considering a change of profession. He enjoyed working with the choir but found he was dissatisfied with the demands of full time church work. He had always enjoyed math (often a corollary to musical talent) and decided to pursue a master's degree in Mathematics at UNC alongside his work at the church. One of Richard's math professors suggested that he should look into the up-and-coming academic discipline of Computer Science, which seemed to offer more practical applications to the job market than math. Richard acted on that suggestion and switched his course of study, a decision which changed the direction of the rest of his life.

When Richard had finished the course work and his thesis for his degree in Computer Science, he was hired by the university to work in their administrative data processing (ADP) department. He continued to work at ADP for the rest of his career, advancing to the rank of program manager until retiring in 1995.

Shortly after they married, Richard and Emily decided that the best course of action going forward was to build a house while both had jobs and then start a family. In pursuance of that goal, they bought land in a new subdivision in Durham County just outside Chapel Hill, built their new home there, and in 1974 moved into the house where they lived together for the next 51 years, until Richard's death. Their first child, Jay, was born in December 1975, and Emily quit her job to take care of him. Their second son, Rich, was born five years later in November 1980, and the family was complete.

Cats were always a big part of the family. Both Richard and Emily had grown up with cats as pets, so they found instant compatibility in that respect. As the family grew, the cats obligingly accepted their new human brothers, and Jay and Rich became cat lovers as well. When Richard was homebound at the end of his life, Ozzie, the last surviving family cat, enriched Richard's life by consistently sleeping near him on his bed.

Throughout his life Richard pursued many interests and hobbies. He was an avid gardener who loved nothing more than being outside with his hands in the dirt. He grew prodigious amounts of vegetables every summer, and in the wintertime pored over seed catalogs deciding what to grow next. His produce, both fresh and preserved, was part of the family's diet year-round. Gardening was an interest that kept Richard busy and in good physical shape into his 80s.

Though gardening was an activity he pursued his whole life, Richard had an eclectic succession of other hobbies and interests over the years. During one phase he made attractive hooked rugs that still adorn the house. Later he took classes in stained glass art and made some beautiful lamps, vases, and ornamental plaques for his own and Emily's use and as gifts for family and friends. He collected stamps for a long time, and acquired a large collection of National Geographic magazines that is complete back to 1913. Having never been interested in sports before, Richard became a fan of baseball when his son Rich started playing in middle and high school. The interest carried over into major league baseball when he and Emily became fans of the Atlanta Braves. They traveled to Atlanta several times to see the Braves play in person and watched many games on TV during the season.

In the early 2000s, Richard and Emily took up a particularly interesting hobby selling antique postcards on eBay. When traveling, they always made time to stop at antique malls and stores where they might find postcards they thought they could sell for a profit online. It was a fun and educational hobby for both, and it became a cooperative effort that brought them closer to each other.

And then there was music, always music. A love of classical music and opera was one shared interest that had attracted Richard and Emily to each other. Though he no longer had a career in music, Richard continued to have a deep interest in and love for it. He had a massive collection of recordings which he catalogued in a database, combining his data processing and music skills. Over the years he and Emily traveled to New York a number of times to attend performances at the Metropolitan Opera, as well as an occasional play or concert.

They also took the children to New York on several occasions and made memorable trips with them to Mammoth Cave in Kentucky and Acadia National Park in Maine. But Richard’s most lasting influences on his children were intangible ones. Although they showed little interest in gardening as children, both sons are now avid gardeners, surely a reflection of their father's passion for growing. Though opera may not be their favorite, Jay and Rich both have a broad and eclectic interest in music. Both sons also inherited an interest in computers and have surpassed their father in that regard by running websites and building modern software. They both share a quirky sense of humor with their father, enjoying comedy such as Monty Python that can be appreciated on several levels. Most importantly, Richard instilled a strong love of family that Jay and Rich carry forward after his death.

The family wish to thank the dedicated nurses, aides, and social workers of UNC Palliative Care and UNC Hospice who made Richard's final months and days comfortable with skillful and tender care.

Richard is survived by his wife Emily; his son Jay; his son Rich, daughter-in-law Erica, and grandsons James (Junior), and Charles (Cookie); step-niece Penny Ewing and step-nephew Randall Burwell; and cousins Kimberly Kemp, Melissa Christensen, and Tara Christensen. He was preceded in death by his grandmother; his parents; his brother, James W. Joiner, Jr., and his sister-in-law, Dixie Lee Salter Joiner.

A memorial service will be held at 2:00 p.m. on Friday, April 11, at the Watts Street Baptist Church, 800 Watts Street, Durham, NC, followed by a reception at the church where the family may be greeted.

In lieu of flowers, memorials may be made to Independent Animal Rescue, P.O. Box 14232, Durham, NC 27709 (Independent Animal Rescue ); Safe Haven for Cats, 8431 Garvey Drive, Raleigh, NC 27616 (Safe Haven for Cats ); or Watts Street Baptist Church, 800 Watts Street, Durham, NC 27701.

The Joiner family is under the care of Hall-Wynne Funeral Service. Online condolences: https://www.hallwynne.com/obituaries