Margaret ???Marge??? Elizabeth Mcaneew

Margaret ???Marge??? Elizabeth McAneew passed away oneebruary 9, 2018, in Durham, NC. She was born on July 14, 1941, to Marge and James Considine ineew York City. Marge enjoyed a thrilling childhood in the city trying to keep up with her older brother James, who now lives in Charlotte, and Mary, who predeceased her in 2009. Marge married her best friend John on May 2, 1964. Marge and John together nurtured and inspired eight children and neeteen grandchildren. Marge???s children and their spouses are: Greg and Marie-Helene (Larchmont, NY), Elizabeth and Mark (Williamsburg, VA), Paul and Jiani (Ridgewood, NJ), Mark and Christa (Cincinnati, OH), Ellen and Shannon (Charlotte, NC), Steve and Tina (Holden, MA), Kat and Brendan (Hurdle Mills, NC), and Chris and Hilda (Chicago, IL). Her grandchildren are: Claire, Isabella, John, Caroline, Lilly, Colette, Griffin, Teresa, Olivia, Catherine, Grace, Nora, Pauline, Nathan, Thomas, Malcolm, Alec, Jonas, and Kiera. Marge is also survived by a wonderful extended family of sisters and brothers in-law, cousins, nieces, and nephews. In addition to raisineeight children, Marge remarkably found time to share her many talents with couneess people beyond her family. In addition to their own children and grandchildren, Marge and John touched the lives of thousands of kids as religion, math, and art teachers for close to fifty years at St. Jerome Church in Norwalk, CT, Church of the Presentation in Upper Saddle River, NJ, and St. Patrick???s School ineersey City, NJ. Marge was a beautiful writer and an accomplished artist, and contributed to many articles and books oneeligious education. Marge was blessed with so many warm and loving friends throughout her life, from her early days on Convent Avenue ineew York to her last few years here in Durham. She shared all of her gifts so freely over the course of her life, even as her defining wisdom, sense of humor, courage, and compassion gave way to the beautiful laughter and smiles of her more recent days. Christ truly lived withineer on earth, and she has now been called home to be with our Lord. Friends may visit the family from 6-8 p.m. oneednesday, February 14, 2018, at the Hall-Wynne Funeral Home, 1113 W. Main Street, Durham, NC. A Mass of Christian burial will be offered 8:15 AM Thursday, February 15, 2018 from Immaculate Conception Church, 810 West Chapel Hill Street, Durham, NC. Marge???s family suggests that in lieu flowers donations may be made to the Durham Nativity School (https://www.durhamnativity.org/donee) or to Duke HomeCare & Hospice (https://gifts.duke.edu/daa). Marge???s family has tried to share a few of our many wonderful memories our of lives with her. We would encourage you to add any recollections you might have in the space below. Thank you. Mom loved reading mysteries even though she was rarely surprised by the endings. She always figured them out oneer own. A friend from middle school said she loved coming over because Mom always had some kind of project going. Once she came over and mom was laying out tiny scraps of Laura Ashley fabric she got at the warehouse sale to make a king size quilt, but it could have been anything: scraping paint off old furniture or gardening or changing the wallpaper with Dad. It made her so happy to be with her sister and brother, and she loved Dad???s family too. Everyone she encountered got a smile or a wave, whether she knew them or not. I remember watching her play with the grandkids and pick up little things for them while she was out???books, art supplies, anything creative. As an adult living near home after college, when Mom and Dad were ineeak grandparent mode, I loved spending time with her and the kids baking, or watching her bathe them in the kitchen sink. I am so grateful now that I was able to be a part of that time. She neer was able to be with my kids in that way but I still learned so much by observing how she related to small children. She taught me how simple it could be to help them feel loved and safe aneencouraged to express their own unique ideas. Mom???s role in my own kids??? lives has been much different, but no less inspiring. Since they were born, we???ve had to have direct conversations about what it means to love and be loved. Without language to rely on, they showed love by helping and being patient. We talk about respecting differences and not making assumptions about what someone thinks or their abilities, because we caneever truly know. We talk about how much we caneearn by paying close attention???how someone???s eyes light up, if their hands are relaxed and open. We talk a lot about gratitude, and how Grandma has so many people who want to help her now because she spent so much time helpineeveryoneelse. Dad has taught them that she???s the queen and the boss: she sets the schedule and she sits at the head of the table, every night. I think of all the people around Durham who knew Mom and Dad by sight: A Durham police officer, the guy who owns the bike shop, the doormen at the hotels, the neighbors in the building, the kids at church. Anytime people learned that Mom and Dad were my parents, I got the same reaction: people looked me in the eye with deep sincerity and told me how much Mom and Dad meant to them, even if they had neer exchanged more than a ???Hello??? or ???Good morning.??? There???s no way you could witness their connection and without understanding that Mom did something real and important to earn Dad???s devotion, and that being there with her was where Dad found meaning in every hour of every day. They moved us all to ask ourselves what we were doing to create the bonds that will carry us through our days. It was was the gift of a lifetime to spend so much time with her as she became, in many ways, more and more herself, no distractions or responsibilities to interfere with her warmth and geneeness. We now have another person to pray to for a good parking space at the mall during Christmas. Thank you Mom for showing us unconditional love, leading by example and being the kind of personee all hope to be. I know you will always watch over us, provide the genee guidance and reassurance we need when times are tough and share in our joy during the good times. I caneemember Mom working really hard oneer religious education book and how blown away we were whenee actually got to see it in print. Mom loved Mary Higgins Clark books, butterscotch sunees, and the beach. The last one always surprised us, because she couldn???t swim very well and defineely did not like fish. She shared the special Shrove Tuesday traditional dinner of pancakes with money in them. Mom was so genee and kind, but at the same time was fiercely committed to her kids and supportive of all our endeavors. She truly loved all of the communities of the churches she attended during her lifetime. There are just so many amazing moments! Mom the city girl helping us take care of the bugs and critters we caught, not to mention Miss Greek???s two snees. We don???t remember ever thinking to ask, probably because we don???t remember her ever being anything other than encouraging aneeven interested in whatever had our attention at the moment, gross as it may have been. Mom was also great at special events -- sports games, graduations, and weddings. Mom with tears ineer eyes on Ellen???s surprise Christmas visit back from Arizona. Mom waiting up for us no matter how later we got in. Feeding friends and family at holidays, taking care of Aunt Mary. And always so funny, mostly without ever realizing it. And she neer stopped being our mom. The last memory I will choose to have of Mom is from a visit a year or two ago. As the kids ran around the apartment her eyes followed them and she reached out and brushed their hair when they came close. Mom was the wonderful teacher who knows so much about everything but was always so polite about sharing her thoughts. Sometimes she would just lead by example, taking a young grandchild outside on a cold day rather than attempting to argue with his hesitant parents. Mom could also be pretty tough, too. When one of us thought he might have broken his thumb in school, she still had him do his paper route on his bike (?!) before taking him into the emergency room. The thumb was of course broken, but the papers got delivered anyway! I loved hanging out with you mom especially shopping - which I have a terrible penchant for - as I knew she would not scrutinee or judge. We vacationed together in Spring Lake aneenthusiastically went to town. She chatted amiably with the storekeepers paying, much to my delight, scant attention, as I ransacked the stores. Whenee got back home I finally thought I had found my ideal non-judgemental, happily oblivious shopping companion until I heard her tell her son, ???Boy your wife sure can shop.??? *** If we had to come up with a sinee expression of all that she did for us, it is this song. "You Raise Me Up" By Josh Groban When I am down and, oh, my soul, so weary; When troubles come and my heart burdened be; Then I am still and wait here in the silence, Until you come and sit awhile with me. You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains; You raise me up to walk on stormy seas; I am strong when I am on your shoulders; You raise me up to more than I canee. You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains; You raise me up to walk on stormy seas; I am strong when I am on your shoulders; You raise me up to more than I canee. You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains; You raise me up to walk on stormy seas; I am strong when I am on your shoulders; You raise me up to more than I canee. You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains; You raise me up to walk on stormy seas; I am strong when I am on your shoulders; You raise me up to more than I canee. You raise me up to more than I canee.